Dispatch of the Day #6

START

Every week I think they’ll be nothing to write about in girls’ and women’s football. I’m always wrong.

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

Which game(s) did I watch this week? On Saturday, I took in the 14s East League Cup semi-final between East Fife and Arbroath Youth Yellows in Leven. Games between these two teams have always been entertaining affairs and this one was no different. A clinical Arbroath led 2-0 at half-time. East Fife’s second half comeback, with an early goal, was short lived as the Yellows ran out 4-1 winners. It would’ve been easy for me to stay at home, save some petrol and follow the game on the respective clubs’ Usqor but the weather was good, the football was great (both teams trying to play football the right way) and the coaches and supporters representing both teams are decent people. The referee had a good game too. What more can you ask for? A perfect way to spend a Saturday morning. A three-year old’s birthday party on Sunday meant no football viewing but I got some cake so win-win!

WELCOME TO MY WORLD

Always good to hear of new teams joining the women’s game, so it’s welcome to Benburb WFC and Carron Huskies who are joining the SWFL leagues next season. Good luck to both!

QUIT PLAYING GAMES WITH MY HEART

One of the main talking points in the 18s Cross Region Emma Mukandi league has been the decision by some teams to actively forfeit games against Glasgow Girls rather than play them.

With the collapse of the Youth Performance League at 18s, Glasgow Girls started the season as one of the favourites to win the regional cross region league. However, two very big wins in their first two games (over 40 goals scored with none conceded) gave cause for concern for some teams in the league and I’m told that there was a movement to encourage teams not to play them. In the league, four of their games, for whatever reason, have been forfeited, with another one in the Challenge Cup going the same way. While some of those teams may have had legitimate reasons to forfeit, others were forfeiting games with Glasgow Girls while also looking (very publicly) for friendlies on the same day as the scheduled league match.

Whatever the rights and wrongs surrounding the circumstances* that found Glasgow Girls in that league, teams should be making every attempt to play their fixtures, whoever the opposition is. Saying you don’t want to play a team because you think they’re too strong is a somewhat defeatist attitude, as is actively encouraging other teams to forfeit too. I also get that a heavy defeat can have a demoralising effect on some girls but there’s more benefit from the steep learning curve of a game like that than sitting at home doing nothing. Since those first two heavy victories, Glasgow Girls’ winning scores have been reasonably ‘normal’ (for want of a better word). While they’re still unbeaten, they are by no means runaway leaders in their league. Going into the summer break, they hold a 3-point lead over Giffnock, with last year’s league winners Rossvale, a further three points back.

Before anyone accuses me of being an apologist for Glasgow Girls and taking their side, I should point out that they’re one of the few teams to block my account on Twitter. I tried to find out why last year, hoping to get unblocked but I got nowhere.

(*I’m told that one of the reasons the 18s YPL didn’t go ahead was because some teams from the central belt didn’t want to travel north, in what was supposed to be a national league. I believe there were two, maybe three teams, from North region interested. Teams in the central belt don’t know how lucky they are because the distances covered by teams in the North are horrendous. Would it really have been such a hardship to travel north two or three times in one season?)

RULE THE WORLD #4

From section 12(c) of the Youth Regional League and League Cup Rules 2024:

“Postponement of a cup/plate game shall only occur with mutual agreement between both the opposing teams and the League Administrator. In the absence of unanimous agreement regarding postponement, the original fixture date must be adhered to.”

I’ve chosen this rule for a reason, which I’ll discuss in the next section…

I CAN’T GO FOR THAT (NO CAN DO)

There was a situation recently when both semi-finals of a regional League Cup couldn’t be played on the scheduled date. In each semi-final, one team was unable to field a team (for whatever reason) and requested a postponement. While in one semi-final the teams were in agreement and a postponement was granted, in the other semi-final the host team refused the request of their visitors to play at a later date.

This situation also occurred recently in a 14s League Cup quarter-final when the visitors refused the home team’s request for a postponement and were awarded the tie. The hosts, who only had 10 players and a coach at the Euros, offered a number of alternatives dates and even offered to reverse the tie. I’m told the away team said they couldn’t get a pitch, only for the home team to not only find a pitch but provisionally book it. Despite the home team bending over backwards to get the tie played – even giving up home advantage – the away team refused and were awarded the tie.

Several other ties were also postponed this weekend when both teams agreed to it. It’s credit to them when teams could’ve easily taken advantage of that rule.

The rule mentioned above seems to be weighted heavily in favour of any team who makes a conscious decision (for whatever reason) to refuse to agree to a postponement. It seems crazy to award a game based on a negative decision. Is that really how you really want to “win” a cup tie? Don’t you want to go through on merit by beating the opposition on the field of play? Rules are important but so is common sense. Karma dictates that you might be happy to use that rule in your favour today but somewhere down the road, the tables will be turned, and that rule will be used against you and you won’t be happy about it. What’s sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.

I did ask one of the clubs why they refused to grant their opponents a postponement, but they didn’t respond.

GAMES TWO CAN PLAY

This weekend just past, there were approximately 42 Cup and Plate quarter-finals and semi-finals scheduled to be played. Only 32/33 went ahead. In previous seasons, the League Cups and Plates were done and dusted before the summer break. However, the introduction of the grading friendlies in many leagues has pushed that back. Teams are now pushing back fixtures until August but with the Challenge Cups still ongoing and a lot of league fixtures to be played, there could be some big fixture issues ahead.

While it isn’t always possible, for any number of reasons, I’m a great believer in getting fixtures played when they’re supposed to be played. Experience has shown me that come November teams are scrambling around trying to get fixtures played, sometimes playing three games in a week, and every season there are leagues which are left unfinished.

SATELLITE OF LOVE

So, the new COMET IT system is live. Except it isn’t. Well, it is. Sort of. Clubs were told last Tuesday that “while live it is not currently operational from an SWF perspective”.

The message went on to explain, “That means, that while SWF staff are being trained to navigate the new system, we will not be in a position to advise on COMET’s use or initial challenges clubs may face”.

They said, “It also means SWF will need time to transition to the new system”. I thought that’s what they were already doing or was that just the SFA?

The message continued, “although the system is live it will not yet reflect fixtures and scores accurately…” So, no change from the old system then?! I’m joking, of course. Well, sort of.

SLIGHT RETURN

Last Wednesday I sent to an email to the SFA asking for information about how their NextGen Performance Leagues are decided (points? goal difference? rock, paper, scissors?) and when and where the NextGen Category 2 Cups and Plate finals are being played.

I received an automatic reply, which was split into a few parts. The first three sentences related to the new COMET system, which doesn’t auger well. The fourth sentence said, “we will endeavour to respond within 3 working days”. Not “we WILL respond” but “we’ll ENDEAVOUR to respond”.

[Update: I found out, quite by accident, that all six NextGen Category 2 Cup/Plate finals were being played this weekend just past (22/23 June). Not one piece of information on the SFA website about them (especially if you wanted to watch any of them) and still no reply from the SFA]

SHAME, SHAME, SHAME

While not wishing to sound like a broken record, I have to report of more issues around player, coach and crowd conduct at more than one girls’ game this weekend. It’s always disappointing to hear more stories of coaches being red carded, fighting between players, and opposition parents offering to fight coaches. I also heard of an adult threatening a 12-year-old player.

In what society is that acceptable behaviour? Will it take a very serious injury (or, heaven forbid, something worse) before something gets done about it? Are we going to have a situation where girls’ games get played ‘behind closed doors’, without supporters because parents can’t control their emotions? When are these macho idiots going to take a long hard look at themselves and realise they’re achieving nothing from their actions except making a complete tit of themselves and ruining the sport for their child and everyone else? If the red mist descends on you during a girls football match then maybe you should question if this is the pastime for you. Perhaps tiddlywinks or draughts or maybe knitting might be more your thing.

Football is supposed to be a vehicle for development; socially, physically and mentally. It teaches teamwork, discipline and hard work. However, it seems that a very small minority of coaches and parents seem hell bent on channelling aggression in the wrong way and teaching players the ‘dark arts’ instead of helping them to learn the basics of the game they claim to love.

THAT JOKE ISN’T FUNNY ANYMORE

I usually try and end on a light-hearted note but Scotland’s performance at the Euros was no laughing matter. Thankfully, we have the Tartan Army who continue to support the national team through thick and thin. Some of the pictures and videos on social media from Germany have been hilarious.

On that note, I shall wish you all a good footballing week.

Paul
#GirlsResults

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Dispatch of the Day #5

ENTER SANDMAN

Just when you think there’s a quiet week in girls’ and women’s football…

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

Which games did I watch this week? Due to some untimely (and ultimately very expensive) car issues, I only caught one game in the past seven days and that was Saturday’s 14s East Lana Clelland league derby encounter between Dunfermline Athletic Reds and Bayside at Queen Anne High School. With several match options available to me, I plumped for this game simply because neither team is on Usqor and the quickest way to get the score would be to turn up and watch it. The Reds dominated and won 5-0 although the visitors suffered for not having a proper goalkeeper.

The dogs may be set upon me for what I’m about to say but it’s an issue close to my heart. I’m not sure what was more disappointing; hearing a home coach tell his girls to target the non-keeper with shots or the apparent lack of encouragement from the visiting coaches towards the volunteer between the sticks, beyond the odd shout of “Pick it up!” As a father to a goalkeeper, it pained me to see her struggle with some aspects of the position, although she gets major plus points for taking one for the team and she certainly showed good hands on any shots hit at her.

Outfield players don’t appreciate how difficult it is to be a goalkeeper until they have to play in that position themselves. This is why you should never criticise a goalkeeper, especially a temporary one. You don’t need to tell them they’ve made a mistake; they know! They’re often an afterthought and teams don’t seem to miss them until they’re gone. Give your goalkeeper(s) the technical and mental support they need, and they’ll stick around. If not, there are plenty of other teams looking for a keeper.

SOMETHING’S GONE WRONG AGAIN

The German language has some great words when it comes to expressing an emotion or a situation. Two of my favourites are the well-known schadenfreude (pleasure derived from someone else’s failure) and the less well-known backpfeifengesicht (a face in need of a slap). Reading Revolutionary Spirit, the autobiography of Paul Simpson, frontman and songwriter of 80s bands The Wild Swans and Care, I came across a third great German word, namely Götterdämmerung. It might be a slight exaggeration to use this word in relation to the latest cup draw shambles emanating from the SWF, but the chaos element of the expression seems pretty spot on.

I’m beginning to lose count of how many times I’ve blogged or posted about the League Cup and Plate draws performed (and I use that very loosely) by the SWF this season. The latest “draws” for the 14s Central League Cup and League Plate, published last Tuesday (11 Jun) for games to be played just four days later on Saturday (15 Jun), eventually turned up. (Tuesday is also the day on which teams are expected to have informed their next opponents of the venue, kick-off time etc.) It took me approximately two nanoseconds to spot the latest problem.

To describe these draws as lazy doesn’t really do it justice. The quick turnaround for games is no excuse for the latest dog’s dinner of a draw. Maybe dog’s dinner is the wrong phrase because the draws aren’t a mess, in fact they’re neat. Too neat. There’s absolutely no pretence that any kind of random (and fair) draw has taken place. For those who still haven’t spotted the issue, I ask you to look at the draws pictured above and, starting with the first home tie, run your eyes down the list of home teams then, when you get to tie 8, look across to the away team and work your way up. Yes, that’s right. It’s just an alphabetical list of the teams who qualified in each competition. So if you’re lucky to have a team (or teams) whose name begins in the first part of the alphabet (Gartcairn, Holytown Colts and Milton Girls) you’ll be granted a home tie and if your team’s name starts later in the alphabet you get an away tie e.g. Stirling Albion, Rossvale, West Park and, the worst affected club, Phoenix, who had three teams in the Plate. They did the same type of draw with the 14s East League Cup and 14s West League Cup draw back in April.

In the Youth Regional League and League Cup rules posted on SWF’s own website, it states that, “The League Plate will be an all-in draw between teams eliminated in the League Cup from a
round(s) determined by the Regional Management Committee, or such other format [my emphasis] as directed by the Regional Management Committee in consultation with the Strong Quality Growth
Committee and Girls’/Women’s Policy Working Group, and ties shall be arranged in the manner
approved by the Regional Management Committee and shall be played on the dates arranged.” I can’t believe that this draw format would be given the go ahead by the RMC and/or String Quality Growth Committee.

As previously documented, this competition (and others) has been littered with issues and has been, quite frankly, to quote The Thick of It, an omnishambles. 68 planned group games (of which only 59 were played) took us from 37 teams to 32, split across two competitions. All these games to knock out just five teams! (Two of those teams to not even make the Plate were Tier 1 sides). I have no doubt the SWF will offer the excuse that the draw was done like this because a quick turnaround was required but it was an issue or their own making. Would it really have taken that much longer to draw two sets of eight ties in the traditional balls-from-a-receptacle fashion? I wonder if these draws are actually checked and deemed acceptable by fresh eyes before they leave Hampden.

One of the original groups (which I numbered as Group 4 because the SWF didn’t think to number them at all) had three unplayed fixtures (out of ten). I don’t know if teams were told when the original groups were drawn back in April that all fixtures had to be played by Sunday 9 June, or if this guidance was a last-minute, panic-driven, move-the-goalposts decision. Teams now had very little time to book pitches and prepare for the last 16 ties. One learned friend commented, “It’s actually quite insulting that they think that little of the girls’ game that this is how they decide a draw.” Can you imagine if they did this for the men’s Scottish Cup? Aberdeen forever at home, with St Mirren always on their travels!

Another issue with these draws is that there appears to have been no incentive for teams to win their respective groups. A reward might’ve been to avoid other group winners in the last 16. However, the Calderbraes v Stirling Albion Whites and Dunblane SC v Stirling Albion Reds ties put that notion to bed with four group winners in opposition. Solution: Put the balls denoting the group winners in one bowl, the group runners up in another. Pull one from each bowl into a third bowl, mix them and then pick one out. They’ll be the home team, the other will be away. That would’ve taken five to ten minutes to do.

Postscript: Following the weekend’s ties in the 14s Central League Cup and Plate competitions, I was asked by one club for a list of which teams had got through. Why? So they could put them into an alphabetical list and work out who they’d get in the quarter-finals! I kid you not. A club secretary from another region also asked me about the likelihood of this happening in their region. I suggested that if it does, they should ask for a re-draw.

Further Postscript: No sooner had I published this blog than the 14s Central League Cup and Plate QF draws were sent to me. Yet again, there were errors and those errors involve putting the wrong Gartcairn and the wrong Rossvale through to the quarter finals! On Saturday, Gartcairn (tier 1) defeated Rossvale Thistle (tier 3) 9-0 , while Gartcairn Whites (tier 3) lost 1-10 to Rossvale Reds (tier 1). However, the SWF has put through both losing teams. The error has been pointed out to them but they have exacerbated it by changing it to having both Gartcairn teams through! Wrong again! Somehow, the SWF has the result of the Gartcairn Whites v Rossvale Reds as a 3-1 win for Gartcairn, instead of 10-1 to Rossvale Reds! Eventually, the results were corrected and the right draw was posted but only after some frantic emails!

IT’S NEVER TOO LATE

It only took the SWF until the middle of June to realise that every region had a 14s Plate except South West. Better late than never.

YOUNGER GENERATION BLUES

The imminent moving of the age groups in the NextGen Performance League continues to cause ructions amongst players, parents and coaches. My DMs are full of disgruntled parents of unhappy players. I’m hearing tales of teams not fulfilling fixtures, coaches leaving, and many, many players looking for clubs.

Still, there is no public information available on the new setup. Mind you, they seem to have enough problems posting the kick-off times on the SFA website.

CONDITION RED

I saw a recruitment advert for coaches and players for a new Aberdeen Ladies team. I was confused. Isn’t there already an Aberdeen Ladies? “No, that’s Aberdeen Women, this is Aberdeen Ladies!” Huh?!

I did some research to find the answer. Aberdeen Ladies (aka Aberdeen FCL), were founded in 2011 following a merger between Aberdeen City, Aberdeen Ladies & Girls, Aberdeen University and East End Girls FC. In 2018, Aberdeen FC started the Aberdeen Women’s team (the SWPL1 team), with Aberdeen FCL taking over the running of the regional and NPL/NAP/NextGen (delete as applicable) girls’ teams. With Aberdeen FCL looking to join the SWF pyramid there might be some confusion, especially with the names being so similar. It reminds me of this section of Monty Python’s Life of Brian.

CRY ME A RIVER

Saturday morning’s scheduled 16s East Caroline Weir league clash between Jeanfield Swifts Jags and Panmure fell foul of a waterlogged pitch at Riverside. Rumours that the cause of the flood was not rain but the tears from local Scotland fans following the national team’s capitulation to Euros hosts Germany on Friday night are, as yet, unconfirmed. Although the possibility of similar downpours on Wednesday and Sunday evening have been forecast. [Photo used with kind permission of Jeanfield Swifts]

On that note, I shall wish you all a good footballing week.

Paul
#GirlsResults

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Dispatch of the Day #4

COME ON IN

Another week of footballing endeavour has been and gone. Let’s dip in to some of the talking points…

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

Which games did I watch this week? Last Wednesday I spent the evening at a blustery Ballast Bank, taking in the 14s East Caroline Weir league clash between The Swifts Blues and Glenrothes Strollers. An excellent first half free kick from Alexis saw the home side lead at the break. The teams shared the next four goals before Olivia scored her second in the last minute to wrap up the three points.

My intended viewing on Saturday was postponed so I opted instead to watch East Fife versus Dundee United in the 14s East League Cup quarter-finals. Maybe it was fate, but this one turned out to be an end-to-end cracker. The home team took the lead on a pitch that looked like the grass hadn’t been cut since Monty Don was a lad. The visitors hit back to lead 2-1 at the break. East Fife equalised before United struck back to lead again. However, the home team were undaunted and equalised with 20 minutes to go. With no extra time in the League Cup until the semi-final stage, it was straight to penalty kicks. United’s first kick was saved, while East Fife missed their fourth. After the regulation five penalty kicks, it was 4-4 and it was down to sudden death. Both teams scored before United missed and East Fife scored to claim the victory. As if the shoot-out wasn’t traumatic enough, there was one extra moment of drama during the shoot out when an East Fife coach noticed that the player stepping up to take one wasn’t on the field of the play when the game ended, therefore wasn’t eligible to take one. The mistake was caught in time and she was replaced. Well done to the eagle-eyed coach.

SO CENTRAL RAIN (I’M SORRY)

In a long-running saga of Mahabharata proportions, the drama of the 14s Central League Cup continues. As previously mentioned in blogs HERE and HERE, the chaos of this competition shows no sign of abating. While most 14s regions are awaiting the semi-final draws for their League Cup and Plate competition, Central region’s protracted League Cup group stage limped to a conclusion this weekend (8/9 Jun).

Clubs were emailed midweek (last week) by the SWF asking that all games be “tied up asap” because they wanted to do the last 16 draws for the Cup and Plate today (Mon 10 Jun) with ties being played on Sat/Sun 15/16 Jun. A very quick turnaround indeed. While the last group fixtures were scheduled for this weekend, there were still four outstanding ties, with three of them being in the same group! The other tie was an abandoned game, which still doesn’t seem to have a resolution. Someone else said that their club was told that no games played after Sunday would count towards the group tables. I also heard there was a tie scheduled for two days after the draw. It’s a bit late in the day to be ‘moving the goalposts’.

Clubs were also sent a copy of the group tables. These tables are not on the SWF website. They’re also not numbered, defying every known convention of group football. How can you identify a group easily if you don’t number it? I digress. I had a look at these tables and compared them to mine. Of the eight groups, only three were 100% correct. These were the errors in the groups they sent (as at last week and BEFORE the weekend’s matches). Note that the group numbers are mine:

• Group 1: Rossvale Reds should be 2nd, not 3rd
• Group 2: Correct
• Group 3: Isla Thistle Whites were missing a bonus point (for winning a penalty shoot out after a draw) and Easterhouse should have been on -10 goal difference, not -6
• Group 4: Correct
• Group 5: The Rossvale Thistle 5-2 Kirkfield United result from 25 May was missing. Milton Rovers were missing a bonus point
• Group 6: Dunipace missing a bonus point and Falkirk’s goal difference should’ve been +6, not +5.
• Group 7: Holytown Colts Reds’ goal difference should be +3 not -1
• Group 8: Correct

I’ll be interested to see what today’s 14s Central League Cup and Plate draws bring up, assuming they go ahead. If they do happen, I may add an update to this section. This competition couldn’t be any more farcical if it had Brian Rix pulling out the draw balls, with his trousers at his ankles, while being chased by a vicar. (Note to self: You really must use more topical cultural references!)

RULE THE WORLD #3

This week’s rules reminder is a rule regarding the number of postponements a team can be granted,

From section 10 (b) of the Youth Regional League and League Cup/Plate Rules 2024, relating specifically to league matches:

“Teams may only be granted a maximum of 3 postponements in any one season with the exception
of postponements granted due to players on International Duty or a Scottish Cup/Challenge Cup
or League Cup/Plate fixture taking precedence and may not apply for any postponements after
the 1st of October in any season. Teams may apply for additional postponement applications in
extenuating circumstances to the Regional Management Committee”

I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE #2

It seems the rumours about three clubs being automatically relegated from SWPL1 at the end of next season (mentioned in Dispatch of the Day #3) are true, with the SWPL making a statement about it last Thursday (6 June 2024). The mooted two leagues of 10 will begin in the 2025/2026 season. The split within SWPL1 will then see a top 6 and a bottom 4.

One thing in the SWPL’s statement intrigued me. Under the list of key objectives, there was the following phrase, “Data illustrated that pre-split the SWPL was below the UEFA average for competitiveness”. I’d love to know what that data was and how ‘competitiveness’ is measured. Does anyone know? Answers on a postcard to @GirlsResults!

I WANT THE ONE I CAN’T HAVE

Word reached my DMs that a club had been fined for making illegal approaches (aka ‘tapping up’) for players. I’m told this offence was committed by someone representing a NextGen team. Whether true or not, the SWF’s Player Approach Policy 2024 makes it very clear what is and isn’t acceptable. Clubs, scouts, parents and players would do well to remind themselves of these rules. Ignorance is no excuse.

YOU’RE FORGETTING

It never ceases to amaze me the short memories that some teams have. If you’ve been mucked about by a team previously in relation to the playing of a match, then learn from that and promise yourself you won’t treat another team in a similar fashion. Do everything possible to get a game played and be as flexible as possible, especially if there’s a short timescale involved. It benefits everybody, especially the players. Don’t be one of those win-at-all-costs teams who don’t care how they get through as long they’re in the hat for the next round. Remember, what goes around, comes around because some teams’ memories aren’t that short and you will, at some point, need a favour returned.

TELL ME WHEN THE WHISTLE BLOWS

I was forwarded an interesting post from a boys’ Fixture Finder page on Facebook. While it concerns boys’ fixtures, we mustn’t be so complacent as to think it wouldn’t happen in girls’ and women’s football. Here is the full post:

“Sadly, due to a number of incidents at recent ESSDA 9v9 and 11v11 matches, Edinburgh Referees have taken the decision not to support our matches for the rest of the season.

We will be holding disciplinary investigations into all the alleged incidents, and players, officials, and teams can expect to receive sanctions if found guilty.

Over the summer, ESSDA will hold dialogue with Edinburgh Referees, and hopefully, we can resolve the reporting issues before the start of the next season when 2013s move to play 9v9. In the meantime, any 9v9 fixture or 11v11 friendly will not be refereed by an Edinburgh based SFA Referee.

Please note – until further notice, Edinburgh Referees will not officiate at any ESSDA scheduled or friendly fixture.”

As I’ve reported on several occasions this season, this kind of behaviour is not unique to the boys’ game. Don’t be so naive to think that it couldn’t happen in girls’ and women’s football.

WE ARE EACH OTHER

One of the main policies I have on my social media pages is, if you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours. (Not literally, of course. That costs extra!) You help me when I’m looking for scores (or other information) and I’ll help when you need recruitment or fixture requests shared. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. However, there does seem to be some teams/clubs/people who are happy to lurk on my pages and reap the benefits of the free service I provide (results, tables, information etc) but aren’t so keen when it comes to reciprocating by answering requests for scores or other information.

One of my other rules is that I ask teams to use the @GirlsResults tag in their recruitment or fixture requests. That way I instantly get notified and I can retweet your request timeously from wherever I am. I ask to be tagged because if you think about my site enough to tag me, I’ll think about your team and share the request. Again, another quid pro quo arrangement in which everybody wins.

There are, however, exceptions. Even if you tag me, I may not retweet your request. If I’ve sent countless DMs to your page, over a long period of time, and they’ve all gone unanswered then why should I help you? This has been an issue with clubs of all sizes, not just the smaller, newer clubs. Occasionally, I’ll retweet requests that don’t tag me and I have no hard and fast rules on why I might make those exceptions. Perhaps it’s from a close friend or maybe a brand-new team who needs a little help.

PLAYING WITH NUMBERS

Last week I privately messaged two clubs to inform them that they needed to change their social media posts. One showed a scoreline which was more than a 9-goal winning margin. While they removed the scoreline, they chose to leave the names of the scorers and the numbers of goals each scored. This defeated the purpose of removing the original big score in the first place.

The other team posted a score for an under 12s game. I reminded them that scores for 12s, 10s, 8s etc shouldn’t been shown on social media as these games are classed as ‘non-competitive’.

While I can understand the latter team not knowing the rules as they’re a relatively new team, the ‘big score’ team have been around long enough to know better.

A CENTURY OF FAKERS

There is an individual within the girls’ game who hides behind a number of anonymised Twitter accounts. He uses these accounts to have a go at other teams or point out their indiscretions, while painting himself as some kind of do-gooder protecting the holy sanctity of the girls’ game. On regular occasions this individual tries to infiltrate my site. He is banned/blocked from my page for numerous issues around his behaviour towards both me, my daughter and teams she played for. His latest attempt to access my page didn’t get very far and, after being blocked, the account vanished, which confirmed my initial suspicions. Everything he does I have taken screenshots of. Perhaps, when I finally give up my site, I’ll share these screenshots with you and tell you some stories about him.

FALLING AND LAUGHING

For all the negativity that emanates from social media, there are still people worth following. People who produce wonderfully original content that guarantees a belly laugh. Many football clubs have also upped their game when it comes to making announcement videos e.g. for player signings. Two such sites combined recently to make a wonderful player-signing video.

I must thank Mark Grant (East Fife) for pointing me in the direction of the fabulous funny @bryansgunn on Twitter/X, which produces some of the most consistently funny football content around. Check out the recent “Who’s on the plane?” video from 7 Jun 2024. One of the best clubs when it comes to social media content has been Raith Rovers. Recently, Bryan’s Gunn and Raith Rovers joined forces to produce a great signing reveal for Lewis Stevenson’s move from Hibs.

On that note, I shall wish you all a good footballing week.

Paul
#GirlsResults

Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/GirlsResults
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/girlsresultsscotland/
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DRAWS: 14s/16s/18s Scottish Challenge Cup – Thu 6 Jun 2024

14s Scottish Challenge Cup – Quarter-Final
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 24/25 Aug 2024)

Here is the draw for the Quarter-Final of the 14s Scottish Challenge Cup:

The Swifts Blues v Hamilton
Glasgow City v Buchan Braves
Winchburgh Albion v Kintore United
Aberdeen West End v Glasgow Girls

16s Scottish Challenge Cup – Quarter-Final
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 24/25 Aug 2024)

Here is the draw for the 4th Round of the 16s Scottish Challenge Cup:

Bayside 16s YPL v Dundee West Royals
Grampian Girls United v Glasgow City YPL
Central Girls v Musselburgh Windsor YPL
Bo’ness United v East Fife

18s Scottish Challenge Cup – Quarter-Final
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 24/25 Aug 2024)

Here is the draw (made 15 May) for the Quarter Final of the 18s Scottish Challenge Cup:

Glasgow Girls v Dunfermline Athletic
St Mirren v Inverness Caledonian Thistle
EKFC Girls v Giffnock or Shetland Girls
Gartcairn v Ross County

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Dispatch of the Day #3

COME BACK TO WHAT YOU KNOW

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more…

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

Which games did I watch this week? Well, on Saturday I did one of my Challenge Cup road trips, where I watched Winchburgh Albion v Milton Girls and Bonnyrigg Rose Reds v Glasgow City, both in the 14s Scottish Challenge Cup and both bathed in glorious sunshine. I blogged about it HERE. There’s a fairly busy programme of games this midweek so I’ll probably take in one of those too.

NOWHERE TO RUN

Last week I posed the following on Twitter/X, “It’ll be interesting to know how many girls will be released by NextGen teams as a result of the age change from 18s to 17s. Anyone from these clubs willing to tell me, even privately?” My DMs lit up like the Blackpool Illuminations.

A conservative estimate has been made at around 280 to 300, which, if even close to those figures, is a hell of a lot. Where will these girls go? Will they try to get into other clubs? Will they go to ladies football? Will they leave the game, possibly never to return? It would be interesting to know the exact number, assuming the powers-that-be are taking a note of such figures, because I think they should. However, I don’t imagine this is a figure that the clubs nor the people running the NextGen Performance League would be happy to share. I emailed Michael McArdle, the SFA’s Girls’ and Women’s Performance Manager to ask but he suggested I “speak with each club” as they have “varying pathways and talent management”. He went on to say, “To provide some insight, some will and may have squads between youth and senior, transition to senior teams as well as various loan options. We also have club led rulings in place for over-age players within NextGen.” He asked that any further enquiries go through their communication team.

The responses I received both privately and publicly, mostly from parents, confirmed that no-one is really 100% sure what is going on. Plenty of conjecture, a lot of conflicting information, and loads of opinions, which were all valid in their own way. With NextGen only having been brought in in February this year, this new version seems somewhat rushed. There doesn’t appear to be any consistency between the clubs as to what information is being issued to parents and players, many of whom are in the dark and justifiably unhappy. There’s certainly no public information for the benefit of those in the NextGen system or the wider footballing community.

RULE THE WORLD #2

This week’s rules reminder is a long-standing rule that still, unfortunately, seems to catch out some new coaches.

From section 21 (g) of the Youth Regional League and League Cup/Plate Rules 2024, relating specifically to Trialists:

“g. A player shall not be eligible to play for a club in a League Cup/Plate tie unless registered for the club.”

I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE

Rumours abound that SWPL1 will see three clubs relegated at the end of next season, with one being promoted from SWPL2. Should it be true, this would bring two leagues of 10 teams for the 2025-2026 season. While I’m normally in favour of bigger leagues, I would suggest there are already big gaps between sections of teams within SWPL1 without widening them even further. Alternatively, bigger leagues might give teams more breathing space and feel more willing to blood some younger players. If it does happen, I imagine that SWPL2 will continue to be very competitive. Of all the bottom clubs in the nine women’s leagues, Stirling University were the highest points scorer with a respectable tally of 19.

I’LL TRY SOMETHING NEW

On Tuesday afternoon (28th May), all the results and fixtures disappeared from the SWF website. I suspect this is as a result of the transition from SFA Live and the new Comet system, although there was no warning or statement on the SWF’s own website that this might happen. While coaches and administrators will be able to access a temporary read-only SFA Live, I’ll have to make do with the fixtures and results I already have on my own system. This month-long hiatus might cause me some issues in terms of posting fixtures and scores, but I’ll try to find a way round it. All I ask is some patience. Feel free to update me on any changes affecting your team. [Update: the results and fixtures returned but there are issues on a lot of pages, again probably because of the transition]

THE COMETS ARE COMING

Along with many others, I’m intrigued to see how the new Comet system works. Will it improve the administration of the game? We all hope so. I’m told that Comet is a much fancier version of Usqor, which a number of clubs and individuals already utilise to provide followers with match information, especially goals. At the moment, I follow 146 teams on Usqor, although not all accounts are active. It’s a great asset in helping to access scores, although some teams use it in very different ways. I’ll be interested to see if every team is able to provide a reliable individual to update each match, live, as it happens, on Comet. Will the SWF require the inputting of substitutions, yellow and red cards, as well as goals? Will there be a way to correct in-game errors? There are some Usqor users who still make mistakes, even though you have to confirm a lot of what you input, which is designed to prevent errors. I recall an SWFL match last season where I was following two teams who were playing each other. Somehow, they came up with a different final score! Verification of results with referees, which I believe is part of the process, should prevent a repeat of this on the new system.

SOMETHING MISSING

Bishopton 14s performed a minor miracle last Saturday (25 May) when, having surrendered a 2-0 lead in their West League Plate first round tie against Hampden Girls, they won 3-2 with the last kick of the game. What was more remarkable was that they did it with just 9 players. Their coach said, “it’s the proudest moment I’ve had as a coach” when the girls said they wanted to give a go.

It’s not the first time this season that a team has turned up with less than a full complement of players just to ensure a fixture is fulfilled. Back in April, Buchan 16s made do with just ten players for their opening league fixture against Aberdeen Blacks. They lost heavily but fair play to them for making sure the fixture went ahead. A similar fate (and scoreline) befell Lauderdale 14s in their away league match to Murieston United Reds, but their performance was all the more miraculous as they only had eight players at their disposal.

These teams put to shame those win-at-all-cost teams who’ll postpone games at the drop of a hat, not because they haven’t got enough players but because they haven’t got enough of their ‘best’ players. How will the other players, who are not considered the ‘best’, ever improve if they aren’t given valuable game time?

ANYONE CAN MAKE A MISTAKE

As I mentioned in last week’s Dispatch of the Day #2, I had hoped to post a list of the outstanding issues on the SWF’s Fixtures & Results page. However, as mentioned above, I couldn’t access them due to the transition to Comet, although that has now been restored.

Instead, I’ll give you a list of the regular issues I encountered, which will, hopefully, be eradicated by Comet:
– Some 14s Central teams play on Saturday and some on Sunday. The SWF would regularly post these league fixtures on the wrong date
– Challenge Cup ties shown for the wrong date
– Fixtures shown with the wrong venue
– Getting cup rounds wrong. When I looked on Monday, I saw a set of Semi-Final fixtures listed as “Quarter-Final” and a “3rd Round” listed as a “Quarter Final”
– Tables not reflecting the results listed
– Incorrect results (still some outstanding, including two from March)
– Missing results (still some outstanding)
– Games marked as Postponed when they were played
– Games marked as Awarded when they were played
– Groups in League Cup competitions not having Group numbers
– Manipulated cup draws (previously blogged about HERE and HERE)

These types of errors were one of the reasons I started my GirlsResults page back in January 2020. Followers of the game, whether players, coaches or parents, deserved better. I can honestly say, hand on heart, that the administration has got worse, not better. I had hoped that there would be such an improvement over the past five years, with lessons learned, that I could stop doing my site and get my life back, especially weekends. I really hope that Comet works and is a success so that I won’t be needed anymore. That is my hope. I need to get my life back so I can get a paid job and go and do other things, including other projects. Not only is what I do time-consuming, it’s also unpaid, bar the generosity of donations. There were a couple of occasions when I wanted to give up, but the faith and support of followers helped me through, for which I thank them all dearly.

SONG FOR A FUTURE (NEXT) GENERATION #2

In the last Dispatch of the Day, I mentioned a club who are emailing every other club in their region to get them to send their best few players to them for a “Detection Day”. I won’t go over that again, but one thing has intrigued me. With three 14s club from that region through to the last eight of the Scottish Challenge Cup and the quarter finals taking place in August, around the time the new NextGen leagues are mooted to start, will players be willing to give up a shot at winning a national cup competition to join the NextGen team? There are some very good teams left in the competition and any team losing their best players before the quarter finals are almost certainly surrendering any hope of winning the trophy. Sure, trophies aren’t everything but it’s nice to have something to show for your efforts in a competition where you only get one, maybe two chances of winning.

I CAN’T CONTROL MYSELF #2

Following on my recent blog (Red Blight Spells Danger), we had another 16s game abandoned on the weekend of 25/26 May and a further midweek 16s game saw one team reduced to 9 players after just 20 minutes following the dismissal of not one, but two players for foul and abusive language towards the referee. I ask again, what steps have the governing body taken to address these continuing problems?

I CAN SEE FOR MILES

On a lighter note, I was at a game recently when the away team, who were chasing the game, had a corner. A parent of the away team, on seeing a player, possibly her own daughter, being grabbed or manhandled in some way in the penalty area by a player who was wearing glasses, shouted something like, “Get your hands off her Stevie Wonder!” Now the home parents were, quite rightly, unhappy about it and made their feelings known. An apology was soon issued by the away contingent. However, it got me to thinking, is Stevie Wonder really the most famous spectacle-wearer in the world? If you’re slagging someone off because they’re wearing glasses, is he really the first person who comes to mind? When I was at school (and that wasn’t yesterday), beloved Gerry Anderson character Joe 90 (Google him, kids!) was the insult of choice towards people who wore glasses.

The corner was scored, straight in as I recall. The opposition kicked off and quickly gained a free kick 25 yards out. It was brilliantly put away by, who else, the spectacle-wearing forward and the victory was sealed. After the game, on the home team’s social media they posted footage of the free kick. What song did they choose to soundtrack it? Stevie Wonder’s “Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours”. Touché.

On that note, I shall wish you all a good footballing week.

Paul
#GirlsResults

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South of the Border! Another Challenge Cup Road Trip

WHERE ARE YOU BABY?

As the respective Challenge Cups approach the business end of the competition, it’s become increasingly difficult to coordinate three kick-off times in one day. With only the 14s and 16s in action this weekend, I was restricted to a menu of just sixteen ties, although two were held on Sunday. The temptation to return North was strong but the travelling distances between games made it impossible, especially when you factor in the journey up there too. Instead, the decision was made to take in two games hosted by teams in the South East region. Unfortunately, a clash of early afternoon fixtures made a third game impossible.

I’VE BEEN THIS WAY BEFORE

Back in April, I ventured to watch Winchburgh Albion play a friendly against East Fife. The home team were rewarded for their dominant first half display with a 5-0 lead at the break. However, East Fife played a master stroke and brought on a 50mph wind at half-time. The game finished 5-1. While I didn’t return to the same venue, Winchburgh Academy, I was heading to Barrett Park, a grass pitch a mere Rory Delap throw-in away. Bar a single canine ‘deposit’, the pitch was in beautiful condition, with freshly painted lines.

An important part of travelling to different regions is (a) getting parked, which isn’t always guaranteed and (b) parking in such a way as to make a quick getaway to the next match. Being one of the first there, I managed to do both. Lessons had been learned from my trip to North region and I was well covered in terms of sunscreen.

LIVING BY NUMBERS

Victories over Finnart Blues (4-1 away), Dunipace (6-1 at home) and St Mirren (4-3 away) had brought Winchburgh to the last 16, while visitors Milton Girls saw off challenges from Melrose (7-2 away), Queen of the South (9-0 away) and Inverness Caledonian Thistle (7-1 at home) to earn their trip to Barrett’s Park for this 3rd Round clash.

Those games served up plenty of goals and this encounter was no different. The action was end-to-end in the glowing sunshine. Winchburgh Albion were out of the blocks fast and took a two-goal lead but were pegged back and the game continued in this fashion with Albion holding a 4-3 advantage at half-time. The second half was a carbon copy of the first with the teams swapping goals…5-3, 5-4, 6-4, 7-4…

OOPS! I DID IT AGAIN

As the game reached its denouement, I suffered from what I call the Curse of the Result Tweet. Fate has it that as soon as I get the final tweet ready to pronounce the final score on the referee’s whistle, something happens in the match, and I have to delete it and re-write it. Twice in the game I hadn’t quite finished writing a tweet about one goal when another was scored! Just as I thought it was going to end up 7-4 to Albion, Milton scored directly from a corner. No sooner had that happened, Winchburgh kicked off and went up the other end where their striker was fouled outside the box. It took Milton a while to organise a wall, but they needn’t have bothered because the free kick was expertly dispatched to the keeper’s left to give the home team an entertaining 8-5 victory.

ALMA MATER

After some quick goodbyes, I headed off to the game 2 via the M9, M8 and Edinburgh Bypass. Unfortunately, the traffic was going at a snail’s pace as I slowly poached in the car. I wasn’t going to make kick-off time for Bonnyrigg Rose Reds versus Glasgow City. As I drove through Lasswade and Bonnyrigg, my childhood flashed in front of me. This is where I spent most of my school years. The Laird and Dog, where my teenage drinking years were spent, was still going strong. Heading up the hill along Polton Road brought back memories of the house I threw up in one New Year (after falling down the stairs!), a bus stop I use to see an old girlfriend off back to her place and my mate’s house where we played Soft Cell, The Smiths and other cool bands of the time. This led me past my old school – Hawthornden Primary – and the shop opposite, which had been owned by ex-Hibee Eric Stevenson. That’s where we bought our Sweet Tobacco, Sherbet Dib Dabs and Panini stickers. “Does anyone want to swap Hamish McAlpine for Harry Hood?”

RIGHT BACK WHERE WE STARTED FROM

Finally, I arrived and was surprised to get a space in the small car park at Poltonhall. It might have been because the game was being held on the astro pitch further up and not the grass pitch I had expected. There’s an embankment surrounding two sides of the pitch, which acts as a natural amphitheatre although some trees obscure parts of the pitch. I turned up in time to see Glasgow City take the lead. I got chatting to a City parent/fan who brought me up to speed with what had happened.

At half-time, I met up with Jonny, a follower from Twitter/X, and his friends, some of whom who also follow my account. They were on a spying mission from Musselburgh Windsor Blues, who were hosting Bonnyrigg in a league match a few days later. I’m a great believer in this kind of preparation. Forewarned is forearmed and all that.

THIS WORLD OF WATER

A Bonnyrigg equaliser was an opportune moment for a much-needed water break. It was a beautiful day for sitting on the bank watching the game, not so much if you were taking part. A moment of controversy saw City re-take the lead in the extra time. A shot that looked like it had gone past the post had, according to the referee, gone through a hole in the net. The players in red and white stood in disbelief. Some of the locals weren’t happy about it, especially one guy who had to be reassured/calmed down by a coach from the home team after his complaints towards the ref were rather over-exuberant. As a neutral, I wasn’t in the best place to judge. The referee was, so his decision is final.

ACTION AND DRAMA

Bonnyrigg didn’t let their heads go down and smashed home an equaliser in the last moments of extra time. 2-2 was a fair result but now it was down to penalties. With one miss apiece after the regulation five penalty kicks, the score stood at 4-4. It was sudden death. Unfortunately, the Reds’ player got a bit too much loft on the ball and hit the bar before going over. City had to score to win, and they duly did. As with the Kintore v Arbroath Yellows match I witnessed two rounds ago in Dyce, this was two well-matched teams separated by the finest of margins. A classic tale of no-one deserving to lose.

IT’S A SHAME TO SAY GOODBYE

If a popular Danish brand of beer made footballing Saturdays, this would be it. Well, apart from being parboiled on the bypass! More cheerios were said and I headed homeward. God speed to the Kingdom, there’s results to be posted!

Paul
#GirlsResults

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Dispatch of the Day #2

HELLO AGAIN

As I always say, like some hackneyed old catchphrase, there’s never a dull moment in girls and women’s football, especially in Scotland. Here are some of the talkin’ points from the past week or so…

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

Which games did I watch this week? An early start on Saturday for the 16s Youth Performance League clash between Dunfermline Athletic and Musselburgh Windsor at Pitreavie. Musselburgh’s better passing in midfield was no match for the home team’s dogged defence. Two quick breakaway goals in the second half saw Dunfermline win 3-1. This was followed by a quick trip up the A92 in time to catch Dunfermline Athletic Reds play Blairgowrie in a 14s East Lana Clelland (Tier 2) league encounter at Lumphinnans. An early lead (about 25 seconds in!) saw the Reds take charge and, while Blairgowrie had chances, Dunfermline dominated to run out 4-1 winners. The cows watching in an adjacent field had seen enough in the second half and wandererd off, probably to Cow-denbeath!

Sunday morning’s drizzly and persistent rain caused me to make an early call not to go to Kirkcaldy to watch the SWFL East league match between McDermid Ladies and Dunfermline Athletic. The weather improved about an hour before kick-off but I’d already made my mind up. Next weekend is the last 16 of both the 16s and 14s Scottish Challenge Cups, which usually means a road trip of sorts. The last one (blogged about HERE) was great but I think this round I’ll check out a different region, subject to kick-off times and games moving dates.

BALL OF CONFUSION

The latest rumours* in regards to the new NextGen leagues are that while the SFA are moving to new age groups of 13s, 15s and 17s, the SWF has decided to stay with 14s, 16s and 18s. I wonder if we’ll get to a stage in the next few years where the two-year cycle, especially at regional level, is reduced to a one-year cycle with teams at 13s, 14s, 15s, 16s etc.

(* I say “rumours” because, while clubs might have received some information about it, the SFA hasn’t posted anything up on their website for the benefit of the wider footballer community who may be interested in what’s going on)

RULE THE WORLD #1

Each week I’m going to highlight one of the SWF competition rules, just as a wee reminder. It could be relevant to something that has happened recently, a forthcoming competition or it might just be an interesting rule I came across while looking for something else. This is one I hadn’t noticed before. I recall back in January 2018 when the East coast of Scotland was covered with snow and my daughter’s coach, desperate for a pre-season friendly, booked the Oriam to play Hutchison Vale 15s Dev at the ungodly hour of 8.30 am. The most memorable thing, apart from the 5-2 victory, was that, while the Oriam was blanketed in snow outside, it’s was so much colder inside!

From section 10 of the Youth Regional League and League Cup/Plate Rules 2024:

“Kick-off times for a Saturday or Sunday match shall be between 9am and 5pm unless mutually agreed otherwise. If the distance travelled one way exceeds 100 miles, the kick-off times shall be between 12pm and 4pm unless mutually agreed otherwise. Kick-off times for a Monday-Friday match shall be no later than 8pm unless mutually agreed otherwise.”

NEW KID IN TOWN

The women’s season began in August 2023 with 92 teams and finished this month with 87 teams. 2024/2025 promises to be even busier with a plethora of new women’s teams taking steps to possible inclusion in the SWFL. Some names mentioned so far have been Aberdeen, Arniston, Bayside, Cumbernauld United, Danderhall Miners, Penicuik, Raith Rovers and St Anthony’s.

SONG FOR A FUTURE (NEXT) GENERATION

As I mentioned last week, some clubs have already taken to advertising publicly for players for the new NextGen leagues, which we hear will start in August, although nothing official has come out yet. One club has taken a somewhat different approach in their attempt to gain Category 1 status. They’ve emailed all the other clubs in their region and asked them to nominate between 3 and 5 of their best players to attend a “Detection Day” for their new 15s team. They held a similar event for 13s earlier in early May.

“By nominating players, Clubs are committing to the potential of their player leaving to join [name of club] as of late July / early August 2024 and as such, commit to voluntarily cancelling their respective player(s) registration to allow them to join [name of club] for Season 2024/25.”

I’m not sure how I feel about this approach because I don’t see what the benefit is to the clubs who are, effectively, handing over their best players to a team who, at some levels, are a rival. Having taken the time, effort and expense to develop these players, what do they get out of it, apart from a weakened team? As far as I can see, only one club benefits out of that.

I CAN’T CONTROL MYSELF

Following on my recent blog (Red Blight Spells Danger), two more games had issues with player/coach/parental behaviour on the weekend of 18/19 May; one of which was abandoned. Another game was abandoned this weekend too. What steps have the governing body taken to address this continuing problem?

BLOC PARTY

Last week there was a match, which I dubbed “The Blocked Derby”. Both teams had blocked me on Twitter/X this season. Had I fallen out with them on social media? No. Had I even spoken to them on social media? No. Had I had a face-to-face conversation/disagreement with someone from either club? No. The person/people behind both accounts just blocked me. I don’t know what (or who) is behind it but I have my suspicions. It strikes me as a somewhat childish, petty and unprofessional move but one I’ll not lose any sleep over. (There’s at least one other team (that I know of) who has blocked GirlsResults but I have given up trying to find out why they blocked me and if they’ll unblock me. Life’s too short.)

The post-match account of the match by the away team (on another social media page) had a sly dig at the home side for dropping down “3 or 4 Championship*” players. The home team didn’t have to justify why these players were used, especially as they hadn’t broken any rules, but they were right to point out the factual inaccuracy of the away team’s claim as only two such players were fielded. (*Note: the initial claim has now been edited). One player was a goalkeeper returning from injury and the other a player who had already spent half the season with the development team. I found the away’s team claim that there was “no negativity” in the original post to be somewhat disingenous.

A DIFFERENT KIND OF TRUTH

Recently I asked a team’s social media page for a score. They said, “6-1”. It turns out it was actually 7-0. When I pointed out the correct score, they said, “doesn’t really matter”. Au contraire, I think it does matter. I pride myself on my attention to detail in everything I do. I make mistakes – don’t we all? – but I try to correct them as soon as humanly possible. You might have one team to deal with, I have 383 in 41 leagues (and that’s not including the ladies’ leagues). For a one-man operation, that’s a hell of a workload so forgive me the odd faux pas.

It reminds me of the story of Van Halen’s backstage requests at gigs. Hidden in the contract, amongst the specific technical details of the band’s stage set up, was a request that there were to be no brown M&Ms amongst the rider backstage. The inclusion of this clause (and where it was placed within the contract) was a quite deliberate means by which the band and their management knew if the contract had been read properly and fully adhered to. It was all about attention to detail. If they didn’t get that right, what else might they have got wrong?

Every week or two I’ll be sent a score for a game from two different sources, usually associated with each club, and they can’t agree on the score. This past weekend there were four games where people couldn’t agree. We’re not talking big numbers. We’re not talking about taking your shoes and socks off to use extra digits to count. Unfortunately, this usually means I can’t publish these scores, which, in turn, means I can’t publish the updated league table(s) (where applicable) and, therefore, I can’t complete all the scores. As you can appreciate, that’s extremely frustrating. While you’re all doing the Slosh down the miner’s club or staying in to melt your brain watching The 1% Club, I’m still trying to track down the Leith Athletic v Currie FC 14s score. This forces me to wait two or three days to get the results, which defeats the purpose of my page, which is to get the correct information out as soon as possible, preferably on the day, for the benefit of everyone.

When I pointed out an incorrect score to another team, they said, “If goal difference doesn’t count would it change anything? At least the points are right!” It does matter because if the SWF can’t get things like scores right on their official website, what else might they be not giving proper attention to? Talking of which…

‘TIL THE RIGHT ONE COMES ALONG

Every week I do one, sometimes two, audits between what I have on my spreadsheets (in terms of fixtures, results and tables) and what the governing body has. Usually, the main issues are missing results, wrong scores and tables where the results posted have not been reflected. Once my list of issues was finalised, I would do one last check that there hadn’t been any corrections made in the meantime, then I would email the list off to the SWF. I figured that it was better for them to receive one email pointing out 20 problems than have to deal with 20 or more phone calls or emails from clubs pointing out each of these errors. Unfortunately, with the SWF no longer engaging with me, I may have to resort to publishing those issues here.

This week’s Dispatch of the Day is already quite big so I might save the current list of issues for next week, assuming they haven’t been addressed by then. I’ll keep you posted.

RE-SIGN OF THE TIMES

One club learned recently why grammar and punctuation are still important. Their pride and excitement at announcing that their coaching staff had all resigned was met with bemusement from some. What they meant to say was that they had all ‘re-signed’! Never has a hyphen been so important. It reminded me of the subtle, but important, difference between “helping your Uncle Jack off a horse” and “helping your Uncle jack off a horse”!

On that note, I shall wish you all a good footballing week.

Paul
#GirlsResults

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Dispatch of the Day #1

I thought I’d start a weekly* column on the main talking points of the weekend, plus detail of games I watched during the last week or so. They won’t be full blogs as such, just a few vignettes, maybe funny incidents and other stuff. Give me a shout if there’s anything you think needs talking about, whether serious or less so.

(*maybe more or less often depending on how busy I am)

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

On Saturday I took in the 14s East League Cup 2nd Round tie between Bayside and East Fife at Aberdour. The early morning fog was burned off by the sun and a beautiful morning ensued. Some of the Bayside girls had helped to prepare the pitch the day before, including painting the lines, and it looked great. There have been occasions, during previous visits to this venue, that the touchline on the supporters side has been invisible. No such issues today. Their previous encounter here was a grading friendly back in February, which had ended 2-2. Bayside took the lead in that game, as they did in this game. East Fife soon equalised and while it wasn’t exactly one-way traffic, East Fife did start to dominate, particularly in midfield. East Fife led 5-1 at Bayside, including a hat-trick for Megan. Another Bayside goal in the second half was sandwiched between two more goals from Megan and the match ended 7-2 to the visitors.

I took a day off on Sunday due to some issues with my knees. Old age doesn’t come itself and I’m not as match-fit as I should be.

THE AGE OF REVOLUTION

So far I’ve seen adverts from three clubs – all from the South East – recruiting for the new NextGen Performance Leagues, beginning in August. Hibernian, Spartans and Boroughmuir Thistle have all put out adverts on social media looking for players born in 2012, 2013 and/or 2014. There hasn’t been any official announcement from the SFA about the set-up for the new season, but I’m told there are new age groups, consisting of 13s, 15s and 17s. As an aside, two of those clubs tagged me, so I retweeted their adverts. One didn’t tag me, so I didn’t retweet it. You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.

BEG, STEAL OR BORROW

I have no objection to teams utilising the tables I produce for GirlsResults on their team’s social media pages. Infact, I encourage it. You don’t have to ask (or pay, unless you really want to!). But I would ask that you keep the @GirlsResults branding that normally sits under the table and, maybe, if you remember, a credit like “Table courtesy of @GirlsResults” would also be welcome.

If, however, you wish to use content from this blog, you MUST ask my permission first (check the Ask Me, Ask Me, Ask Me section to the right). One team, who shall remain nameless, helped themselves to the cup draw information featuring one of their teams. Not only did they not ask permission, they didn’t even credit where they got it from. I told them, “If you’re going to use content from my site, I’d appreciate it if you give a credit to where it came from.” I don’t think that is unreasonable. Their response, instead, was to take it down the original and re-do it in a different (and less accessible) font. It would’ve taken 30 seconds to just edit their original social media post and add a credit.

MY CAMERA NEVER LIES

Having seen myself on a club’s VEO last week I can confirm that, yes, cameras really do add on ten pounds…at least!

HAPPINESS IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER

I was honoured to be asked by The Swifts Blues 14s to pick what I thought was the pick of their five goals against East Fife last Wednesday. While there were some great team goals, with wonderful passing and movement, I went with the final goal, which sealed the win just before the final whistle. A corner was played in from the keeper’s left and, somehow, as if by magic, it went straight in. Most of the people present, and maybe some of the players too, are still wondering how it happened. I’ve watched it many times on VEO and I’m still not sure. On that basis, I chose that one. Congratulations Erin!

WORDS DON’T COME EASY

In the course of the last four and a half years running the site, I’ve come to learn there are certain words I always seem to type wrong. For some reason, “Glasgow”, “Thistle” and “United” become “Glagsow”, “Thitsle” and “Untied”. It’s a good job I haven’t posted “Ross Ocunty” yet!

SEE YOU SOON

There has been a spate of teams withdrawing from leagues this season, for a variety of reasons. Best wishes to these teams as they regroup and attempt to go again at a different level, later in the year or maybe next season.

CARELESS HANDS

I felt sorry for the team, this weekend, who gave away not one, not two but FOUR penalties, all down to handball offences. All four penalty kicks were converted. Rumours that the team will quit football and turn to volleyball next season are, as yet, unconfirmed.

On that lighter note, I hope you enjoyed this little jaunt through my week and I’ll do it again soon.

Paul
#GirlsResults

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DRAWS: 14s/16s/18s Scottish Challenge Cup – Wed 15 May 2024

14s Scottish Challenge Cup – 3rd Round
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 1/2 Jun 2024)

Here is the draw for the 3rd Round of the 14s Scottish Challenge Cup:

Aberdeen West End v Athena Glasgow
Burnbank Blues or Hibernian Whites v Hamilton
Bonnyrigg Rose Reds v Glasgow City
Winchburgh Albion v Milton Girls
Kintore United v Dundee West Reds
Burnbank or Inverness Caledonian Thistle Reds v Buchan Braves
Turriff United Youth v The Swifts Blues
Glasgow Girls v Stirling Albion Reds

16s Scottish Challenge Cup – 4th Round
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 1/2 Jun 2024)

Here is the draw for the 4th Round of the 16s Scottish Challenge Cup:

Westerton United v Musselburgh Windsor YPL
Dundee West Royals v Aberdeen Reds
Ardrossan Winton Rovers Blacks v Central Girls
Grampian Girls United v Dumbarton United
East Fife v Glasgow Girls Purples
Bayside YPL v Athena Glasgow
Glasgow City YPL v Queen of the South or Huntly
Bo’ness United v Montrose

18s Scottish Challenge Cup – Quarter Final
(Ties to be played Sat/Sun 24/25 Aug 2024)

Here is the draw for the Quarter Final of the 18s Scottish Challenge Cup:

Glasgow Girls v Dunfermline Athletic
St Mirren v Inverness Caledonian Thistle
EKFC Girls v Giffnock or Shetland Girls
Gartcairn v Musselburgh Windsor Whites or Ross County

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Hit The North! Another Challenge Cup Road Trip

BOY ABOUT TOWN

While most Saturdays and Sundays I’ll venture out to see one or two (three at a push) local matches, I like to spread my wings and go further afield during the weekends of the Scottish Challenge Cups. Who doesn’t love a road trip? In the 1st Preliminary Round of the 14s Challenge Cup, I took in games at Cowdenbeath, Lumphinnans and Dalgety Bay. Okay, so they’re not that far from home but, with it being the early rounds, there were a lot of ties and many scores to collate and publish when I got home so I figure something local would be more beneficial. The following round was the 2nd Preliminary Round (don’t get me started on the SWF’s random round numbering) and I headed up to Angus, taking in two games at the wonderfully named Hercules Den – home to Arbroath Youth – and then headed along to catch most of the Montrose versus Dumbarton United Yellows. Sadly, my next planned venture to Bo’ness and Alloa didn’t go to plan as I was laid low by an untimely chest infection.

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

So where would I be heading for the weekend featuring the 18s 3rd Round, the 16s 3rd Round and/or the 14s 2nd Round? (See what I mean about the numbering?) Having seen the draws, I had a fair idea of at least one tie I wanted to see but which other matches could I fit around it? With the governing body’s website not always being the most reliable (Saturday games listed on Sundays and vice versa), I made a point of contacting most of the clubs involved to get the correct venues and kick-off times, as well as checking out their social media pages. Once I had those, I consulted Google Maps to see what was achievable.

Knowing I would be driving for just over two hours to get to the first game, I scheduled some tweets (sorry Elon, it will always be Twitter) to give some playful clues as to where I might be going.

AS I ROVED OUT

I had no recollection of ever going to Dyce before, but my wife reminded me that we’d been to a wedding there back in the early 1990s and stayed at a hotel near the airport. My favourite memory of being in Aberdeenshire was going to one of seven gigs of a Scottish tour by The Smiths, who stopped off at Aberdeen’s Capitol Theatre before heading to Lerwick and Inverness. (I wrote a blog about that tour, which you might enjoy).

NEW DIRECTIONS

The route North was fairly straightforward or at least it should’ve been. Not knowing the roads of Aberdeenshire I wasn’t aware of any major changes. I’d given myself plenty of time – I left at 7am – to get to Dyce so I was prepared for any unplanned detours, which is always a possibility when I’m behind the wheel. I went for the belt-and-braces approach of a satnav alongside my phone, hoping that both would agree with each other. How did that work out? Well, as I heard my phone telling me to go off at the new A90 North, the satnav said keep going ahead. I did what any sensible, mature man would do; I ignored the modern, up-to-date phone and listened to the older-than-the-hills satnav and kept going. As it turned out, because I’d allowed for plenty of wiggle room for the journey and it was still early in the day, it didn’t make that much difference staying on the A92, which took me through some suburban areas of Aberdeen. I seemed to arrive at Asda in Dyce around my scheduled time so I was quite happy but I resolved to use the new A90 South (officially known as the “Aberdeen Western Peripheral Route” but unofficially as the more user friendly and straightforward “Aberdeen Bypass”) to get to the next game because, with extra time and penalties being a possibility, I might need to catch up a bit of time.

BOY, YOU’VE GOT THE SUN IN YOUR EYES

You never really know when summer’s going to appear in Scotland. I had checked the weather forecast and I saw it would be nice, but I wasn’t prepared for just how hot it would be. I’m not really built for heat. Despite parking in Asda and getting some provisions for the next leg of the trip, it didn’t occur to me to get sunscreen. Rookie error. Another mistake was to believe the Asda security guy who told me there was no limit to the time I could park at the supermarket. Having been there for about an hour and then spoken to several other locals, I decided it would be more prudent to move my vehicle. I drove to the car park in Dyce Academy next door and was lucky to get the last space. Result! I might have been a pasty-faced southerner when I arrived, but I was going to be resembling a lobster when I left.

TALK OF THE TOWN

Having seen Arbroath in an earlier round it was great to say hi to some familiar faces, including one of the Yellows’ coaches Stuart. One of the other coaches – World Champion bowler Darren Burnett, no less – was sunning himself in Australia so would miss the game. No doubt he was glued to his team’s Usqor account. It was nice to meet some Kintore folk too, including my good friend Lena, who is also the secretary for the Kintore United 14s and a fountain of knowledge about the game in the North region. Kintore had been down to Pitreavie to play a Bayside team in a pre-season friendly, so it was great to catch up with her on her patch.

LOOKING FOR THE MAGIC

Having heard a lot about Kintore from Lena and having seen Arbroath Yellows live, I knew this was a going to be an even contest between two well-matched teams who try to play football the right way. With both teams unbeaten in their respective leagues, and having drawn a pre-season friendly 1-1, I knew this was one of the matches of the day. Kintore got off to the best possible start with a goal inside the first couple of minutes from Katie and it took Arbroath some time to find their feet against slightly bigger opponents. The Yellows came back into it and their pressure was rewarded with a penalty ten minutes before half-time. Harlow put it low to the keeper’s right. 1-1! Game on!

While the game ebbed and flowed back and forth, and chances were created at both ends, I felt Kintore began to dominate, especially when the game went into extra time. But Arbroath defended stoutly, and the scene was set for the inevitable penalty shoot-out. How would the tired minds and bodies of the girls handle the pressure? They’d all worked their socks off for 90 minutes, in blazing heat and, even with the inclusion of water breaks, some of the girls looked dead on their feet at the final whistle. Plenty were suffering with cramp.

NERVOUS WRECK

Thankfully, the penalties were being taken at the end I was watching from, so I didn’t have to move. In this heat, I’m not sure I could’ve moved, even if I wanted to. What can you say about penalty shootouts that hasn’t been said before? Some like them, some hate them, but they’re part of the game and unless you want to keep playing until midnight (don’t give FIFA any ideas!) they’re here to stay. After the regulation five penalties, we were at 4-4 and it was time for sudden death. If there was any more drama, that sudden death might’ve been mine and I was a neutral! The Kintore number 6 converted her penalty, but the Arbroath number 8 was distraught to see her effort saved by Kintore keeper Jane.

What was great to see was that while Kintore allowed themselves a moment to celebrate (and why shouldn’t they?), two of their number broke off to console with the Arbroath player who had missed. The other Kintore players joined them. It was a beautiful moment that almost brought a tear to my eye.

I FOUGHT THE LAW

The referee gave an impressive display and let the play flow. Like most good referees, he was pretty much invisible, but he did have to deal with one minor incident (I think it was in extra time) when one player was spoken to about her attitude and the coach, who wasn’t happy about it, was also spoken to and told to “be a better role model”. His gas was certainly put at a peep.

But that was a very minor issue, during a game played in a great spirit. No quarter asked nor given on the field, in soaring temperatures, and everyone supportive off it. That’s how I like my football.

LET ME GO

Lena had suggested I had my picture taken with the teams at the end and I was happy to oblige. A couple of girls even knew about my Girls Results page and were followers, which was great to hear. I managed to chat with lovely people from both teams before, during and after the game but, after saying my goodbyes, I had to head off in search of match number 2 and the elusive A90 South.

SOUND OF CONFUSION

I returned to the car park to find my car had been kindly decorated by some of the local birdlife. I don’t what they had been eating but they might want to see a vet. No amount of screen wash was clearing some of it! As long as I could see enough to catch the sign for the A90 South I’d be fine. Did I see the sign for the A90 South? Yes. Did I follow the sign for the A90 South and learn from my earlier mistake? Well, er, no. Once again, the satnav and phone were squabbling and, in the course of the distraction, I took the wrong route. It had to happen when I was in even more of rush, thanks to the extra time and penalties.

PLAY ON

When I originally planned the trip, I had a vague notion that should the first game be finished in the regulation 70 minutes, I might just be able to catch some of Forfar Farmington 14s tie against Turriff United, before heading on to a third game. It was a long shot but the shootout in Dyce put paid to that, and I bypassed Forfar and headed straight to the Charlotte Street pitches in Dundee for Dundee West Reds 14s against Motherwell. It was a good job I did because the Forfar-Turriff game also went to extra time and penalties, with Turriff winning the shootout 5-3 after a 2-2 draw.

While Dundee West Reds are currently in the bottom third of a very competitive 14s East Caroline Weir league (led by Arbroath Youth Yellows), Motherwell were on a bit of an unbeaten run and in good form. It was set to be an intriguing tie.

When I arrived at the car park, the first sight I saw was a mound of earth. Had I arrived at an archaeological dig? Voices in the distance told me the game was further over. I headed over to a grass pitch on the far side. I saw the players walking off and, after asking a Motherwell supporter the score, I tweeted that it was 2-1 at half-time. Except it wasn’t half-time, it was a water break! D’oh! Correction duly sent.

Chatting to some of the Motherwell supporters, I met a follower of Girls Results. Murray (aka Champion Slayer, his Twitter nom-de-plume) was a big fan of the site and very complimentary. I was blushing although it was hard to tell as my face resembled a beef tomato.

One talking point was the pitch. Motherwell were used to playing on astro and they couldn’t play their natural passing game on a lumpy, sloping grass pitch. The pitch next door, which the supporters were standing on appeared to be much flatter. I don’t know if Dundee West Reds chose this pitch specifically or if it was down to availability, but a home draw in the cup can be great leveller and you take your advantages where you can get them. The home team led 4-1 at half-time (not another water break) and not long into the second half increased their advantage. Motherwell clawed their way back into the game with two goals, but time ran away from them and they lost 5-3. I’m told the Motherwell parents are still talking about the pitch!

ONE TRACK MIND

Once more, I said my farewells and headed to the car. Dundee’s avian population were kinder that their Dyce counterparts and no further ‘decoration’ had been added. This part of the journey was the most straightforward and I was homeward bound. Getting in around half past four, I also had the small matter of pulling in all the other scores, as well as posting results and, where applicable, league tables. No rest for the wicked.

HOLD TIGHT!

After a terrible night’s sleep, thanks to the sunburn, and having missed the Forfar-Turriff game yesterday, I called on a local derby in the 18s Challenge Cup to make up the third part of my regular Challenge Cup triumvirate.

Despite being approximately 25 minutes further North (and a bit more East), Raith Rovers Colts 18s play in the 18s South East Joelle Murray league, while Dunfermline Athletic play in the 18s East Kelly Clark league. Colts won a friendly 4-2 back in March at Gallatown. Unfortunately, due to the men’s first team needing Stark’s Park for training ahead of their forthcoming Scottish Premiership play-off with Partick Thistle, the 18s Challenge Cup tie was moved from there to the grass pitch at Gallatown Park. Another game across from another Asda!

HERE COMES THE SUMMER

Having not learned my lesson from yesterday, today’s attire was a long-sleeved top and a bunnet to protect my napper! I might be parboiled by the end of the game, but I was taking no chances. While it was still warm, there were some clouds in the sky. This brought some relief but not much.

SUFFER THE CHILDREN

As well as the heat (have I mentioned that?), the teams had to contend with a sloping pitch (flashbacks to Charlotte Street) and the kind of long grass you might lose a team of under 8s in. This would be an energy-sapping game. Let’s hope it doesn’t go to extra time.

Shooting down the slope in the first half, Dunfermline took the lead and doubled it 15 minutes later with Raith getting one back to trail 2-1 at half-time. Five minutes from the end of the second half, the Colts equalised, and we headed for extra time. For the neutral, this was great but as someone who had another game to go to this wasn’t ideal.

BABYLON’S BURNING

After full-time, there seemed to be a discussion on the other side of the pitch between the referee and some of the coaches. They were also looking across at me so I figured this was about the issue of whether there was extra time, or would it go straight to penalties, so I ambled across the pitch to join the discussion and help clarify things. While the referee was happy for it to go to penalties “for the sake of the girls” playing in the heat, we found the relevant rule and extra time it was. [Clarification: League Cup ties go straight to penalties until the semi-final stage. In the Scottish Challenge Cup, it’s extra time and penalties in all rounds]

At one point in the game, the Dunfermline keeper kicked a ball rather than pick it up because she couldn’t see the lines. The grass was so long it looked like Raith were playing a back line of dandelions!

Within a minute of kick-off in extra time, Raith regained the lead and held it until half-time. It was all or nothing for the visitors and they were rewarded with an equaliser with ten minutes to go. The game was finely balanced. Would there be a winner before the end, or would there be more penalty drama? The answer was the former. The Pars managed to breach the solid Raith defence with five minutes to go and Rachel slotted home from the edge of the box for the Pars. Raith had a couple of late free kicks outside the box but weren’t able to beat the Pars keeper, who was in good form.

A 4-3 win on the road for Dunfermline, who will be flying the flag for East Region in the quarter-finals.

SOME KIND OF JERK

Apart from a couple of yellow cards – one for each team – the game was played in a great spirit (especially considering it was a derby) and the young referee Ollie let it flow. Unfortunately, there was one unsavoury incident when a supporter, presumably from Dunfermline, who wasn’t happy with an offside decision vented his feelings rather too vociferously. Not content with expressing his opinion about the decision, he also made a comment about a Raith player. Full credit to Bev, the Colts coach, who calmed the guy down. He also apologised for what he said to the player but was asked to watch the game from a different area of the pitch so as not to exacerbate the problem. Well done Bev!

5-4-3-2-1

One thing I noticed during the game was that the Raith goalkeeper Lauren was wearing the number 4. This isn’t, by any stretch of the imagination, a regular keeper number. Bev, her coach, told me she used to wear 4 as an outfield player for Lomond Colts and when she moved to Raith she wanted to keep it when she went between the sticks.

It reminded me of the Dutch World Cup squad of 1974, who, with the notable exception of Johann Cruyff (number 14), were issued squad numbers in alphabetical order. First choice keeper Jan Jongbloed ended up being number 8 and he retained that number for the 1978 World Cup finals.

CAN’T HELP THINKING ABOUT ME

The 18s derby wasn’t my last game of the weekend. Extra time and roadworks on the A92 meant I arrived at Pitreavie for the Dunfermline Athletic v Musselburgh Windsor ladies league match just at half-time. It was 1-0 to the visitors and the home coach wasn’t happy about the referee. After watching the second half in the company of striker Alex’s mother, I could see why. I’m not sure I’ve witnessed a more self-important refereeing display. I had seen this guy before and he was the same then. He was arguing with supporters, players and coaches. Even Thomas, the mild-mannered club photographer, was shouting at him and it takes a lot for him to do that. The ref could certainly learn a thing or two from the three other whistlers I watched this weekend. I know it’s a difficult job but he made it even harder for himself.

GROOVY TIMES

That was the weekend that was. It was hot, it was exhausting but it was so much fun.

Sincere thanks to the parents and supporters of Kintore United, Arbroath Youth Yellows (see you all again soon), Motherwell, Raith Rovers Colts and Dunfermline Athletic I met this weekend. Apologies to Dundee West Reds as I didn’t get a chance to say hello to coaches or supporters. I might see you in a league match soon though. Great to see Stuart from Arbroath, Linsey Burnett and Darren Inglis too. If I have forgotten anyone, and there’s a good chance I have, let me know and I’ll add you.

Extra special thanks to Lena Roy, Kevin Taylor Photography (thanks for the photos and if you could airbrush a couple of stone off me next time, that would be great!), Bev Harkins and Justin Hamilton (and coaches).

HARMONY IN MY HEAD

You’ll notice the different sections of this piece have ‘headlines’. These are actually the titles of songs from the special road trip playlist I compiled for the journey north and back. Most, but not all, of the tracks are available on Spotify and here’s a link to my special Hit The North! playlist. The tracks are taken from about a dozen 3-CD clamshell box sets covering a number of weird and wonderful musical genres from various decades.

HALFWAY THERE

With a handful of ties left to play in each Challenge Cup (being played this weekend coming), it looks like we’ll have to wait until next week to find out the last 16 draws (16s and 14s) and the quarter-final draw (18s). Hopefully, by the time those ties come round my sunburn will have died down to a mild pink hue instead of the current flaming red and I can plan another trip around the highways and byways of Scotland. I might even go the right way.

#GirlsResults

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